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100 WC Week 6 – Lucas

18 Oct

The noise was SO loud, it burst through my ears, deafening me ferociously. I had no idea where I was going, I just kept on going on through the streets of London. I heard the ominous drone of helicopters coming closer and closer. Eventually I dived in to a side alley my heart pumping fiercely, I thought I was safe until I heard the shouts of a cop ” I’ve found ‘im, over ‘ere” he was running at me with a truncheon in his grasp, but he was the least of my worries, I quickly sidestepped him and ran straight ahead…

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3 Comments

Posted by on October 18, 2011 in Information

 

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3 responses to “100 WC Week 6 – Lucas

  1. JL

    October 18, 2011 at 3:42 pm

    Hi Lucas. Well done – I really enjoyed reading this short story. Your descriptions are superb, and really make me feel involved in the story. I’m really pleased to see how well you’ve used grammar in the story. JL

     
  2. Mrs Skinner

    October 19, 2011 at 6:15 am

    I love this Lucas! ‘the drone of the helicopters’ – brilliant! I liked the image of ‘side stepping’ too. Not sure that ‘ferociously’ fits though. Great writing for the 100WC! Thank you!

     
  3. mrcobbsclass

    October 19, 2011 at 8:33 pm

    Great writing Lucas, like Mrs Skinner I like the ‘drone of helicopters’ phrase a lot. I also like the way which you have used some dialogue in the story, it really bring brings the character alive. Next time remember to read through before posting, I think you may have missed a comma or two. Well done.

     

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