It was a quiet sunday morning and i was walking my dog on the downsit was sunny and the atmosphere was great.I stopped and took in the beatiful surronding.The thudding behing me became faster and faster stronger and stronger.The noise was so loud i turned round and my eyes were met by a group of galloping racehorses swallowing up the ground with every poundig stride the took.I called my dog every second they came nearer and nearer i ran but they were close very close.I swung round and was speechless as i saw 15 racehorse coming towards me.I screamed and fell…
100 WC Week 6 – Romy
16
Oct
mrcobbsclass
October 16, 2011 at 7:30 pm
Well done Romy, some good word choices make this an interesting piece of writing. I like the thudding behind me… When you finish a piece of writing always reread it and check how it reads, it helps to iron out some mistakes.
rufus199
October 17, 2011 at 8:59 am
Well done Romy, I like this piece of writing, espesially the ‘thudding behind me’!
The cliffhanger grows some suspense…
I think you could look at your spellings, there are a few tiny mistakes.
etp
October 17, 2011 at 9:31 am
Amazing story romy you definately derserve to win the 100 word challange , I really liked this sentance … I swung round and was speechless as i saw 15 racehorse coming towards me.I screamed and fell…
Next time maybe look through to see if you have made any mistakes or not
well done
Mrs Skinner
October 17, 2011 at 3:36 pm
Romy, this is a great piece of writing. I love the way you have built in the sounds as well as the feelings of your character. I’m also impressed with the cliff hanger you have left! Well done for sharing this story on the 10WC!
rg blo
October 19, 2011 at 6:05 pm
great piece I think you should have won it.